reconcilation/bitch talk
Monday, June 29, 2009
8:23 PM
I wrote this post some time back after the mishap. since im gonna update today i'll post this up anyway.
After a decade, i had to make a second trip to IMH for an entirely different reason. It was nasty nasty nasty. In a situation like that, i become a baby, i couldn't act like an adult, i just wanted to run away from all that drama or sat somewhere far away and cry. The experience was a good testament of how the government sector treats people and do their job. I'm referring to medics/nurses/shrinks and the police except that they are foc and they don't carry invoices around charging people for making a report. They're the best of all. when I was at the brink of falling apart, that unfamiliar person appeared out of the blue. His appearance saved me, for that I'm grateful. Its funny how the worst case scenario can lead to the sweetest ending. Surprisingly, there isn't much hatred left after the scar he imprinted on me 10 years ago. I felt like before again. It was that familiar and amazing feeling to be seated on the back seat while listening him singing along to a hokkien song. I see so much of him in me. With so many similarities that we share from the facial features to the character and temper, exploring them first-hand was great because I've no one to seek reference to. Plus we love singing and drinking. You have no idea how much I've missed all this while. That unfamiliar person shaped my early years as a role model and a heart breaker. We'll reconcile this. Perhaps i can take some fatherly advice in future. Something that I've dismissed long ago. Oh yah, the patients there are interesting! I could just watch them all day seriously. Whatever happens, the game of restaurant city and Sims 3 must go on!
here comes the bitching part. Today i shall break the silence. It pisses me off so much when some people think they know everything about me when they know zilch. I do not like to come across as predictable but at the same time i do not hide who i am. im not easy to figure u can trust me on that. Actually, i wouldn't care if some of them think I'm a slut (just a random noun) because their opinion of me is the least of my concern. The rest who fall into the other category, it just kills me to have misunderstandings like that. I don't carry a loud speaker and start rambling about myself and my life. Its just not my style of dealing with a conversation. People always take it the wrong way. Empty nutshells! I'm generally very patient but I realised it's biased towards the females or a he-she. I've had a couple of friendships that turned sour because of my intolerance of male chauvinist pigs. That piece of shit ought to keep his condescending remarks to himself or watch out!
No matter how messed up life gets, i don't feel inferior anymore because im so over that and im more than that. deep down i know it'll pass. For now, i could only take one step at a time, the circumstance shan't stop me from doing great things. YES! Much better now. no more angsty.
On the bright side, those alphabets that appeared on the screen on my notebook were bloody awesome. It's thrilling to confirm what i believe im capable of. Some assurance i got there and i can use some pride that i hid inside my pocket some time ago. Ive been busy lately sorting things in my head n some lame holiday activities created by moi. Im gonna embark on a 'food quest' next week! Say pls come back roar!
